Birth...

Rock and I have been together for 8 years now, no we aren't married and have no plans to be at this point.  Marriage is not something necessary to love someone else or to have a baby.  This is somewhat unsettling to many, none more so than our niece Gemma, who was so hoping to be a flower girl, unfortunately we have disappointed her and probably others with the thought that we won't be getting married.  I am proud to say that my parents never have been married and have been together 35 years.  The Common Law route runs in my blood;) .  

I decided about 6 years ago that Rock would be the father of my kids.  Just watching him with animals any one would be able to tell that he is a caregiver.  I had never seen someone be so gentle with a puppy as I had when my parents dogs had puppies.  Rock held each one as if it were a precious gift.  

Now 6 years later we have our own, human, special gift, Edy Elizabeth Liddington-Goss.  An awesome little miracle!  A MIRACLE...I used to think when people said this to pregnant moms and even to me while I was pregnant, that they were exaggerating just a bit, "really a miracle" I would think.  "Isn't it just science? Egg and sperm mix, and a little human develops".  Well after having gone through the whole experience from Egg and Sperm to actual Human Being, I can say it is a miracle and a real one. Of coarse there is science involved, but aren't all science experiments miracles in some small way?

My baby belly at about 32 weeks.

Edy arrived here on May 8, 2011.  She was born all natural as Aspen Valley Hospital.  An amazing experience all around.  From the breaking of my water at 4:30 Sat. to the actual delivery of Edy at 5:15 Sunday morning, Mother's Day.  We had the most amazing nurse, who only worked once a month and we were lucky enough to have her.  My parents, sister and Rock were all there, the best support system.  The midwife Nancy was the perfect person to have there, especially wanting to deliver naturally.  

Giving birth in my mind is a bit of an out of body experience.  When the actual pushing starts...don't get me wrong...it hurts like HELL, but for me at least it wasn't as bad as the Gallstones I had about 9  years ago.  That was 2 years of excruciating pain where I had to crawl, literally, into the ER, was barely able to talk, move my abdomen or touch it for that matter, it was horrible and painful and there was no reward in sight except maybe the thought that someday, I could get rid of this Gallbladder and not have to deal with this any more.  While giving birth I was able to stand, scream, bend over if needed and the best part, I knew that at the end of this, I would have a gift that I had been waiting for since I was 10.  The reward made giving birth an almost, yes ALMOST, pleasurable experience.  

The "out of body" part happens when your pushing so hard, your eyes are going to pop out of your head and your face is purple and the midwife tells you to push harder, you have no idea how you can accomplish pushing harder, your at your limit.  So in my case at least I just left my body and watched myself push harder.  You look down "there" and all of a sudden you see a little body a  little you emerging into the world, coming from your body.  My most vivid memory at this point was looking to my left where my dad was standing, looking into his eyes and saying, "DAD, I AM TOTALLY FREAKING OUT RIGHT NOW!"  Unless you have been through child birth you can't imagine how strange it is to have another human body come out of your body.  They put the baby on your belly, you're a bit dazed, in shock and the happiest you have ever been.  All the pain of labor, contractions and just being pregnant are a now a distant memory.  You are now in love with a new life that you just met and that you are now totally responsible for...YIKES!!!